The Rhinestone

Nashville citizens signaled their outrage over the weekend as reports circulated that the Metro Nashville Government planned to permanently remove several mature country music performers from downtown Nashville on April 1st.  The controversial move was confirmed by representatives of the Convention and Visitors’ Bureau in a press conference Saturday, noting that the culling of these … Continue reading →

Astronomers at Vanderbilt’s Dyer Observatory are ecstatic to have a once-in-a-generation opportunity of being mooned today, along with the rest of Nashville. The visibly excited scientists confidently declared to reporters this morning that today’s occurrence will be the best mooning that Music City residents are likely to ever see in their lifetimes. “Of course, everyone … Continue reading →

Hoping to supplement his income by capitalizing on today’s Music City visit by President Donald Trump, Fox 17 reporter Scott Couch has reportedly taken to busking on downtown streets, earning extra money as a Vice President Pence impersonator.  According to witnesses, the long-time stalwart of WZTV news is offering to have his picture taken with … Continue reading →

Nashville residents have mixed feelings about an anticipated massive shift in atmosphere when, following several days of chilly weather, an exceptionally sizable load of hot air is expected to come to Music City today. “This is going to be an absolutely massive amount of hot air coming to downtown” noted WKRN Meteorologist Davis Nolan.  “We’ve … Continue reading →

Nashvillians, and indeed the rest of the country and the world, watched with baited breath last night to see if there would be a Predator victory on election night.  Despite some very tense moments during which it felt like the game was still anybody’s to win, die-hard Predator supporters emerged victorious and emboldened, leaving many … Continue reading →

While applauding the Metro Council’s move last night to partially decriminalize possessing small amounts of marijuana, East Nashville resident Sharon Whitherbee says that the local government’s effort still isn’t a bold enough move.  Speaking with local media last evening outside the Davidson County Courthouse following the conclusion of the Metro Council meeting, the self-described Etsy-preneur … Continue reading →

Following an announcement from Governor Haslam yesterday, cautioning Tennesseeans to “maintain their normal fuel purchasing and driving patterns” in order to avoid a potential gas shortage, physician Lee Roy Wills of Sylvan Park joined several of his neighbors, friends, and associates in purchasing four times their usual weekly gas consumption at the nearest gas station, … Continue reading →

Hello Rhinestone readers! If you’ve noticed that there haven’t been any new articles in the last few weeks, well, I apologize for that.  More Rhinestone nonsense will be on its way shortly, but first, I’d like to draw your attention to a great local event that’s going on now: The Nashville Shakespeare Festival’s 29th annual … Continue reading →

Upon being awakened by his parents this morning, area 5th Grader Willis Jones informed his parents that he isn’t ready to go back to a relentless nine-months of preparation for standardized testing, and that he wants summer vacation to not be over yet. “It’s not fair!  I don’t wanna go back!” declared young Willis, according … Continue reading →

While vacationing in Gatlinburg with her family this weekend, Nashvillian Rachel Stubbs reportedly closed her eyes and imagined she was riding a rollercoaster at the former Opryland theme park instead of the one she was actually riding at Pigeon Forge’s own Dollywood attraction.  Other members of her family indicated that Mrs. Stubbs may have, in … Continue reading →