The Opry Mills shopping center reopened today amidst a great deal of fanfare, while local citizens tried to appear enthusiastic and conceal their disappointment that the Opryland theme-park hadn’t been rebuilt instead. “I’m sure it’ll be wonderful” stated Beverly Williams, a Bellevue resident and mother of three, sounding somewhat somber and resigned. “My husband enjoys blowing his … Continue reading
Earlier this week, former Indianapolis Colts quarterback Peyton Manning disappointed the Tennessee Titans and their fans by choosing to sign-on with the Denver Broncos instead. Though anticipation of the UT-Knoxville alumnus’ possible return to the Volunteer State had spurred great excitement among the local NFL franchise, the Titans organization claims that they are already “totally … Continue reading
Hello readers. Thank you for taking time to read the posts on my website, “The Rhinestone”. The intention of this website is to amuse by way of satire. My own leanings in humor tend toward the bizarre and quirky, and I hope that people who come across this site might find my writing funny as … Continue reading
The Resolution passed today in the Tennessee House of Representatives, urging Petyon Manning to return toTennessee, is in danger of defeat after the Tennessee Senate has attached an amendment, further requesting that Manning pick-up a few things on his way back. The initial resolution, House Joint Resolution 785, states “Be it resolved…that this General Assembly … Continue reading
Internationally-famous fashion-designer Pierre Coste’, better known to the public as “Francq?”, is in Nashville this week to prepare for the unveiling of his summer 2012 fashions for the statue Musica. “I am very pleased with the look of this season’s designs, and I think Nashville will be equally pleased” Francq? told reporters today, speaking with … Continue reading
After nearly a week of searching, local authorities are no closer to finding the City of LaVergne, TN. LaVergne, a city of almost 32,600 residents which spans nearly 25 square miles, was last seen in the Northwest corner of Rutherford County near the Davidson County border. Members of the Rutherford County Sherriff’s Departments, assisted by … Continue reading
Local star-gazers, who make a habit of “spotting” resident celebrities Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban, received an extra surprise this past weekend when the couple was spotted having Sunday brunch at the Copper Kettle with the mythological creature known as Bigfoot. “I know they like coming [to the Copper Kettle] most weekends, so I usually … Continue reading
Nashvillians are in shock today after learning that the “Batman Building”, a long-time staple of the downtown skyline, is in fact none-other than billionaire playboy and philanthropist Bruce Wayne. The Bat Building (also commonly known as “Bat-South” or “[B]AT&T”) has been a towering, foreboding presence in downtown for nearly two decades; located north of Broadway … Continue reading
Former Tennessee gubernatorial candidate Basil Marceaux has announced that he plans to come to Davis-Kidd Booksellers in Nashville to hold a book-signing event Thursday night. Marceaux has personally confirmed this with our staff to be “a correct, factualized statement” [sic], despite the fact that Davis-Kidd Booksellers no longer exists, and Marceaux has not yet published, … Continue reading
The Rhinestone 